Ignore my silliness.
Oh god, I rang again and spoke to this nurse who I’ve always really liked (the one who threw the jug of water over me!) but she’s useless on the phone and I had uncontrollable crying which is both very rare and very problematic when on the phone and she kept saying ‘what are you going to do after the call?’ which means she was debating phoning the police, but I’m fine and don’t need to be sectioned in the slightest and I told her that so it’s okay, she just kept saying ‘bloody hell woman’ and ‘oh megan’ and now my brain has exploded. Right okay this is ridiculous but I have this little ‘tradition’ with Annie (which started off as just coincidentally saying it a lot but has now been incorporated in my OCD) where at the end of our appointments I say ‘wish me luck’ (I’m always being neurotic about something and feel in need of luck) and she says ‘I always do’, and I didn’t say it last time I saw her. I’m freaking out about that a bit because obviously my OCD is in overdrive at the moment and also I’m more in need of luck than ever, oh wow sometimes I’m shocked at my own ridiculousness. Well she’ll be getting two reports from the crisis line tomorrow anyway so maybe she’ll call me, I hope I don’t get a call from bloody duty in the morning again asking if I’m alright when I’ve only just got to sleep.
I texted dad saying good morning earlier and he asked how I was so I said ‘I’m fine but out of hours are shit’ and he rang and said ‘well I’ll be driving for at least the next hour and I’ve put hands free on so I can talk to you instead of them’ and I’m actually on the phone to him as I type this and I’m sobbing slightly because I can’t really stand it when my dad is sweet.
Okay, I’ll stop this grammatically disastrous nutterfest now.
